Week 1: Why Forgive?

Forgiveness, as a form of surrender and release, expands our capacity to love.

We cannot love fully and freely if we are holding onto either resentments toward others or deep, unresolved shame. Forgiveness brings perspective and compassion, expanding our capacity to love, both as one who forgives and as one who is forgiven. Our story is the woman seeking forgiveness who washed Jesus’ feet at the house of Simon the Pharisee (Luke 7:36-50). “Her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much.”

Week 2: Forgiving Others

True forgiveness blends both mercy and justice.

Misconceptions abound about forgiveness: that it is weak, that it lets others off the hook, that it promotes injustice, or that it’s a “once and done” effort. This week explores what Jesus says about true forgiveness. Our story is the parable of the unforgiving servant (Matthew 18:15-35) as well as its preceding instructions from Jesus: “Tell your brother his wrong” and “Forgive 70 times 7.”

Week 3: Being Forgiven

Forgiveness means finding the courage to see our own errors – not just those of others.

We all hurt others at some point, whether intentionally or not. By acknowledging our mistakes and making amends to those we’ve hurt, we can experience a humbling process –one that helps us become more forgiving of others. Our story is the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32). “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you.”

Week 4: Self-Forgiveness

Forgiveness turns away the false messages of harsh self-judgment.

Thoughts that we are not good enough, not worthy not lovable – these “stones” are falsities evil spirits throw at us. God, however, is present even in these times of terrible self-doubt reminding us that none of us is perfect: “Let the person who has never sinned throw the first stone.” The week’s story is about the Woman About To Be Attacked With Stones (John 8:1-10).

Week 5: Transformation

Forgiveness transforms us from victim to survivor, from helpless to empowered.

Forgiveness can transform the often crippling emotions of shame or anger into motivation for spiritual progress. By following God’s command to stand up and walk – to move forward – , the pain of our past may transform into compassionate, positive action. The story is about the Lord healing a paralyzed man (Mark 2:1-12). “Take up your bed and walk.”

Week 6: Wrap up and Celebration

Peace and joy comes when we embrace opportunities to forgive.

Reflect on your experiences during the last five weeks, and make goals looking forward.

Forgiveness is hard work. But letting go of the fantasies that we can change the past, that we can change others, or even that we are the ones who can change ourselves opens room for God to help us ward off the resentment we feel. Each time we forgive, it paves the way for the next time we need to forgive. Practicing the courage and patience, and letting the Lord into the process of forgiveness becomes like exercising a muscle, it grows stronger and stronger. Together with Him we can come to a point where forgiveness is intuitive, a blessed way to live!

Reflections for when you find yourself unwilling to forgive

• Do I believe that forgiving requires something of the other person first?
• Has this wrongdoing and resentment become part of my identity?
• What are the pleasures of this anger and resentment?
• Is there a part of me that wants to entertain the anger?
• Is withholding forgiveness about my ego?
• What would forgiveness look like?
• Is this where I want to stay?

When you notice anger and resentments:

• Name the wound.
• Name the trigger.
• Name the person.
• Prayerfully let it go.

"I enjoyed every minute of it. It inspired me and now I have to practice forgiveness."
Armando H

"Thank you for sharing this article. I am killing myself over anger and I'm angry at so many people...
Through your article I've learned forgiving will be very hard but with practice it will become easier. Thank you so much for this message. God paved my way to him through you"
Sheila K

"I am writing a book on forgiveness . There are two articles about forgiveness by Pastor Charles Blair, I would like to use."
Carol H

"Thank you so much for taking the time to write this and for reminding me of what God teaches us about forgiving. I am happy to tell you I have been working on forgiving and God has helped me to let go of the past. I really don’t want this to eat me up because it means I would be relying on my own strength rather than God’s. Thank you lots again for your encouraging words. God bless you greatly."
Carol B

"Thank you so much for all the encouraging words and messages from the bible. I will take all you have said and put to good use...  Appreciate your words of wisdom. I will let others know about your help."
Cathy S